all but Lie ...!

If I say I miss you

It will be a lie

And if I say I don’t

I know you won’t cry

But yes at times

When my heart and soul

Are in unison….alive

I do think of you…as My

You may, may not know

But at that moment of time…

I folllow your life …. as My

Its not coz.. I only loved you

And absolutely notcoz.. I love you more

Its just … you aint worth to forget by..!

I cant say ‘bout your pressence..

But your absence for sure

Just like a Dry Martini

Makes me feel …alive..!

I guess and its just a guess

Somewhere in your mind

Thoughts ‘bout Me…..

Should be live..!!

And there will be something ..

You will forever remember ..Me…by

And I am sure as death !!!

Your eyes will be wet

However hard you try not to…

The day I’ll say my..final Bubye…!!!

But if I say I miss you

It will be a…………

And if I say I don’t

I know you………..

Lies.. n Hearts..!

I missed on number of chances

To make it to yaa…!

But I fought it all hard

This time around … to make it through

Yaaaahh..!

I guess…. I made a mess

Made a mess……. Which I always do..!

I miss you now ….N…. I may always do

However far you push me too…

Break each n every tie

But still I’ll miss … you…for my feelings were never LIE

I dinnn… ask.. I’ll never do….

Why you won’t talk back ?

Even when you wanted to..

It maybe my hope…. Which still belives..in U

If my love is TRUE.. U’ll feel it too…!!

Yaaaahh..!

Someday you will realize …I was not fake

The miles I travelled for yaaa…

Were not ..just a fluke

And on the lonely nights….sitting in dark

You will look for me …N wonder…

How it will be like

If you had ME..!

But I promise I won’t…

Miss or dream of…..

Small of your back…your open hair

Back of your knee…your unarming stare

Your fingers so .. … cold.. Your breath..so warm

And of all the lies you told…

The lovely lie….’’that you love ME’’

Yaaahh..!!

Coz every promise..made to you..

You knowing, not knowing..!

I always hold true..!

College....

If one said u will miss college life

I said … Holy shit, its worse than ..walk on knife

I thought how can U compare.. daily classes and test

To late night bed.. and gettting up after, late noon rest

Getting up early .. for morning prayers at 8

To dreaming at 8 in morning for an evening date J

So…

If one said u will miss college life

I said … Holy shit, its worse than ..walk on knife

No way the boring lectures ….. all day long

To a day.. spent on couch… playing X-Box and listening songs

Exhausting journal completion…. in foyer and on stair

To the long trips…..sun beaches and gurls and nothing to care

But

Guess what…. Now I crave for “Girish kee Chai”

(Girish is a tea/coffee vendor)

That fa**ing in break…. And friends saying ‘Hi’

Those laffing bastards holding U high

And Birthday bums … all twelve months…!

Bunking lectures to play, sometimes P.S and sometime pool…..

The sloshed night outs …. And watching “Old School”

Hooting in theaters.. while watching flicks

Loosing heart to every hot chick

Keeping spare shaving kit, undies….. and a short in college bag

For random plans ….. where frns get dragged

The gossips… in the class the rumors outside

Made weather lively and goofy inside ..!

Wondrous was xamm thrill…

When notes and Xerox … piled up as magnificent hill

Slogging for xamzz… and 20 hours in hand

Everyone looked puzzled…eyes all puffed.. and head blanked K

Examination room…some looked at sky…. Some flipped pages some preferred besides :D

Most amazing in all this tension, when two eyes met…. N there came an innocent Smile..!

There is much more to say and to write

I always knew without friends….. life will be strange

I am out of college now..!…. and this will never change….!!

But

If asked –do U miss ?

I’ll say

Yes, I do miss my friends, my buddies…. And my college days.

Confession…!!!

Let me confess that there is a girl

More precious than diamond or gold

Her beautiful eyes are blue pearls

A strike of her glance just makes me roll

The redolence of her silky hair

Makes my day a lovely affair

Waking up every morning in her arm

Her morning breath…. her touch …. so warm

Wrapped in white sheets….

The way she says… “Morning Dear” ….

Her head …... rested on my chest

Please…Ooo…..! time , freeze and rest..!

Her cuddle her hug…... her gentle slap

Her lazy yawn ….. and the way she curls in her nap

Her highest high her lowest low

Exited her…….. for romantic flick, late night show

I pray …. She and Me be forever the same

Always so childish.. .. and a little insane.!!

.

.

.

.

I wish to walk, holding her delicate hand

In the chilly moon light, on the golden sand

(All my life)

A successful alarm dodges near the dash.

You Dont BREAK My HEART..!

After a long time and infinite failed trials,

When any hope to find her, was, squeezed out

She found me…. And I was pleasantly surprised

All in an instant my faith …. revived in ….. love, when I saw her smile.

She was there in front of me…

Still … unaware of my feelings

(Though feelings are NO feelings unless the ONE feels it)

And I lost in her mellifluous ....talk

While a part of me still seek comfort that she was here at last

Her beautiful face, her fragrant hair, her elegant chin..!

Her simple smile, her bare skin

Just make me feel I am flying high….!

And I swear it works…. better than DRY GIN

I hope this time things go well

Coz again it’s my heart

That pumps like a V8…. Whenever I say her name

Along with, those three pious words

(I Love You)

I pray she knows that she’s my world

Without her I am just a body separated from soul

And I will wait….. for ages forever

Till MY last breath erodes.

All the while!

Watching the old ancient skies………

My thoughts get glued…..to empyrean YOU and I wonder why?

Gripped by the feeling I am gliding in the light blue slushy clouds,

And your greenish blue eyes gazing …. ME, all the while.

The bliss of fresh sunshine

And the chilly soft ….. breeze..!

I sense are illumining my soul stroking my face,

And….. ME chasing your holy elysian … touch, all the while.

I wish never, never… ever open up my eyes

And die a million times….. !!

Coz it’s your rosy lips and your gentle smile,

That gimme the reasons to live on, all the while.

I long, to hold your redolent hair

And kiss your pretty back …. !!!

But…..all wishes vanished and you are gone,

When I was feeling ‘em close, all the while.

Confusion!!!

You want to see me laugh…
But you don’t want it loud.
You don’t want to see me sad……
But love tears in maaa…. eyezz..!
You want to see me happy..
But things that make me happy horrify you.
You want me to be open…. with ya….
But my feelings, my thoughts…. hurt you!!!
You want me to talk unabashed..
But being judgmental …….. its YOU .
Why is it..? You want everything for me …… I want for me…. !!
Yet wannaa cut everything I would love to…
I Love You and I know You Love me too……..
But getting loved, how…….. You wish!!
Is just not always possible…
Be it for ME or be it for YOU.

Dreams….Hope.... Me..n Xpectations!!!

I am devoid of feelings and thoughts,
It’s just … insomnia or all hope lost..!!
Some say I was never meant to grow up,
But I know they never knew me enuff.
The burden of expectations was never my past,
But I never knew ….. the dayzz were short.

I am devoid of feelings and thoughts,
It’s just … insomnia or all hope lost..!!
The empty chase was not my dream.
Scribbling all crap….. ! for a degree is what I mean.
Gone are the days when blessings were vast
Now it’s just monotonocity that cripples my heart…!!!

…. Insanity now seems so perfectly sane..!
And I can just hope again, to play carefree soaked in mud and rain.

Forever in my Heart.

I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

The walk in the park and your romance,
Those phone calls and your lovely laff from night to dawn,
The crazy nights when we use to dance,
I would love to relive those nights if I had the chance.
I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

I wish again to kiss your lips ,
And feel again your breath on bare skin,
I just don’t care what’s right or wrong,
I want you , where you belong.
I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

Your finger strokes through my hair,
I crave most….. On the sleepless nights,
Far away, I know not, you are where???
My soul still seeks, your presence besides.
I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

I still hold the promises made to you,
Though you left me without a clue,
But my heart sings you will be back,
It be my grave, lost, in old shacks.
I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

I miss those moments of sharing glance,
Your playful smile, you lost in trance.

Only You.!!

It’s a sweet summer morn and the sky is blue,
I am looking for ya, without a clue..!
The path I walk will it lead to you,
I don’t care though the chances are few.
I may go down many a times,
But I believe, in the end you’ll drive me through..!

Whenever your name is below my pen,
I wish, time to stop there and then..!
Coz it’s for you…. My life is true,
Else I’ll be lost like morning dew.
I may go down many a times,
But I believe, in the end you’ll drive me through..!

Will I ever stop, but for you..????
May the whole world say……. NOT..! It’ll be anything but true.
The more I try to shut ya out…
More my HEART beats for you.
I may go down many a times,
But I believe, in the end you’ll drive me through..!

My heart my mind, my body my soul,
My senses my cheers, my talk my tears.
Want U back..!
By all means.
Coz when I’m all lost and any hope is gone,
Its only only and only you….. who can drive me through.

Your Cry Your Smile..!

Your cry your smile, your walk your talk, your weird dreams your deafening screams J

Your holy touch…the way you clutch, the way you care..and the earrings u wear…!

I just love you, maaa baby……

You make my senses go crazy!!

The blink of your eyes and …… curl of your lips

Taste of your tongue….! your face so beautiful N so young..!

I just can’t move…away my stare

All I wish is to be your Teddy bear.

The twist of your neck and your shaking hips

Your delicate hands…. waving good-bye

The bounce of your hair on your back….. so lean

When you walked….. in white Ts and light blue jeans.

Without you…. maaa baby

Days…..don’t seem bright, in…. Spring noon,

Nights….. don’t seem…. dark even with NO stars and NO moon

I lose all my breath, as if….. on death bed..!!!